Tag: Relationships


Communication becomes critical to the success of building relationships and reaching goals.

Leaders who communicate well are able to articulate the vision, inspire the actions of others, and strengthen the character of an organization to achieve long lasting rewards. This is what communication is all about.

However, the foundation for these areas is built upon knowing the people who are involved in the work, and this requires the ability to actively listen.

If we have any hope of preparing the next generation of leaders, we must listen. Remove distractions, focus on the person speaking, and truly listen.


We live in a skeptical world. As such, we tend to question the motive or intention of everyone, including those who deserve our greatest trust.

Leaders must give consideration to the needs of others. At times, these needs are hard to recognize, especially when we are only involved in superficial or surface oriented relationships.

Leaders must dig below the surface to learn what is really needed. They must also consider how to provide for the need that exists.

Consideration should be a part of a leaders daily walk in relationship to others, and doing so exemplifies the compassion of great leadership.


The opposite of truthfulness leads in one direction: deception.

Leaders need to not only be truthful in relationship to followers, they need to be truthful with themselves.

Leaders are challenged to be honest enough with themselves to make the kind of decisions that demonstrate integrity.

Being truthful with the direction we should take may not always align with our initial choice.

Being truthful with those invested in following will not allow us to be self-centered.

Being truthful with God will always lead in paths of righteousness.

Be careful not to allow good intentions to validate pretentious actions. Be truthful with yourself, others, and God in all areas.

Emotionally Intelligent Leaders

Based on their book Primal Leadership, Learning To Lead With Emotional Intelligence, Goleman, Boyatzis, and McKee examine five discoveries needed to make an emotionally intelligent leader.

These discoveries involve the following questions:

Who do you want to be as a leader?
Who are you?
Do you work on developing who you want to be, or what someone else wants you to be?
Are you willing to form new habits of practice?
What emphasis are you placing upon developing relationships?

Developing a new mindset and implementing the necessary changes to grow in our leadership is key to reaching goals. Strong relationships help build confident leadership.


One of the most critical areas of leadership involves an understanding of confidentiality. Leaders must know how to keep something in confidence.

Confidentiality speaks to a sacred trust. Followers need to know they can place their lives into the hands of someone they trust.

1) When leaders keep confidentiality, relationships are built.
2) Confidentiality makes leaders approachable.
3) Doing so provides guidelines for developing greater leadership.
4) Keeping a confidence grows a more Christlike character.

Confidentiality is critical for leaders. They must guard what has been placed into their sacred trust. When they do, the resulting development of character builds a leadership worth following.

Making Choices

One of the most frustrating challenges in relationships is reflected in a statement by Colin Powell, “You can’t make someone else’s choices. You shouldn’t let someone else make yours.”

When leaders make choices for others, the potential of resentment exists.

When leaders make choices for others, a certain expectation can be created.

Making choices for others can also lead to an unhealthy dependency.

Leading is about relationships and leading others involves helping them make the right choices, not making those choices for them.

Leadership has the potential of influencing others for a greater purpose. Let us always lead with the desire to help others see the choice of Jesus.

Mentoring…part 4

The mentoring relationship is a mutual relationship designed to establish and achieve specific well-defined goals.

These goals are connected to developing the ability to know, think, and perform.

The ultimate purpose and design of mentoring is to create a relationship that nurtures learning.

A number of elements essential for a learning-centered mentoring program include: reciprocity, learning, relationship, partnership, collaboration, mutually defined goals, and development.

The design is to promote stronger relationships that motivate, inspire, and contribute to development and growth.

This relationship is collaborative and channeled to achieve a support system of success. The mutuality in mentoring increases the viability of the desired purpose in the relationship.

Mentoring…part 1

Information about mentoring is unlimited and various approaches indicate there are options available.

Mentoring involves an experienced and trusted advisor who trains and counsels someone else. The mentoring relationship may extend from a few days to a few years depending on the nature and purpose of the relationship.

As a spiritual influence in the lives of others, we all want to pursue ways we can mentor someone in developing a mature faith.

While it is important to examine ways to get involved in mentoring others, we should also seek someone who can be a mentor. Pray about how to do both.

Last Chance

We have no way of knowing how long we have before desperation creates a situation of panic and despair.

A number of warning signs may indicate we face the last chance for something significant when considering our leadership.

This may be the last chance to…

a) Help someone reach their potential in fulfilling personal dreams and goals.
b) Prepare those closest with a legacy that will help them carry on without us.
c) Build a relationship that improves our ability to lead others to greater success.

If we treat every opportunity as the last chance, what we accomplish may make a lasting difference.

Working Together

“It takes a village to raise a child.” Whether we agree or disagree, one thought is clear, each part is connected and contributes value to the development of the whole. This includes leadership.

Followers need leaders and leaders need followers. Each relies on the other to fill specific gaps that develop stronger relationships.

God designed the church this way. Romans 12 and 1 Corinthians 12 claim the church consists of numerous individuals possessing a variety of gifts. One gift is not greater than another, one person is not more valuable than another, and the proper function of the whole requires each to exercise their ability accordingly.